Ever Thus
by LeftennantAskara
Summary: Set after The Q & the Grey, Q takes pity on Captain Janeway and makes her an offer she and her first officer can't refuse. Written quickly for the captain's birthday. Flames and anon hatred welcome.
1. Prologue

Kathryn Janeway was having a marvellous dream. A firm, warm body moved, moaning, over her and she hummed her approval as she pulled a sweet, swollen lip into her mouth. Her soft sounds changed to a sharp cry in response to the sensations her lover's hands elicited from between her legs. The dream, though vivid, lacked the dimensions of scent and taste but her unconscious, sex-starved brain was hardly complaining.

She ran her fingers through her lover's dark hair as he lavished attention on her breasts. She lifted his head to her own once more only to recoil in horror at what she saw. Her lover no longer wore the face of her second-in-command but was now grinning down at her with a menacing glee that could only come from one being.

She roared, "Q! Get out of my dreams!"


	2. Chapter 2

"O, Kathy!" Q exclaimed, his face a mockery of sorrow. "Kathy, Kathy, Kathy..."

Kathryn Janeway woke, book in hand to find the multiverse's most grating immortal gazing down at her with pity. She sighed, squeezing her eyes shut and sat up in her lounger, hoping he was a figment of her somnolence. She opened her eyes.

"You know, Madame Captain, " he said, kneeling beside her. "When Jean Luc was in a similar predicament, I shipped him off to a fictional reality. I doubt, however, such heavy-handedness would resolve anything in this case."

"I'm not sure what you're talking about, Q. But I'm certain I'm better off not knowing. Now if you don't mind -"

"I'm talking, Kathy, about the lascivious ideas you have about your first officer."

Her expression darkened. "In that case, everything that can be resolved has been. I'll thank you to allow me the privacy of my own thoughts in the future. Now I'll be going to bed. Stay or leave. It's no difference to me. I'm exhausted." She rose and strode to the bedroom, stripping off her uniform as she went.

"I don't believe it," he insisted. "Not for a minute. Here you are, both of you, lusting away for one another with a bulkhead between you. That is not a resolution."

She pulled on a nightgown, fastidiously ignoring Q's gaze. "Chakotay is not lusting away for me, nor I for him. And even if that were so, our being together could spell disaster for the ship. Your imagination has overtaken your common sense."

"My senses are anything but common, Kathy. But you're right. Giving in to these primal feelings for your Commander Chuckles would result in disaster for you and your beloved ship. Hence my predicament."

The words _you're right_ caught her attention briefly and she almost asked what he had meant by that but then the sense that some things are better left unknown made her say, "Then I have the perfect solution for you, Q: Leave me alone."

"I've tried that. I don't like the way it turns out either."

Janeway pulled down the covers of the bed, which had thankfully reverted to the standard Starfleet poly blend. "Then turn me into a Tarqualian duck, Q. I swear by all that is good in the universe, I am too damned tired to care." She buried herself in blankets and pillows as she felt the bed depress beside her knees.

Q emitted an overwrought sigh. "Oh, Kathy. Would that you had allowed me to love you as you deserve. Perhaps then your fate would not be so lonely. So tragic!"

She emerged, swinging a pillow at his head. "In your dreams! Look, I'm sure your intentions are noble, but there is nothing I want from you. I have an amazing life: I'm a Starfleet captain with a beautiful ship and a great crew..." She trailed off, noticing his lagging attention and the wicked grin that had spread across his face.

"Brilliance!" Q took her face in his hands.

She squirmed. "I take it back Q. I don't want to be a duck."

He kissed her forcefully on her protesting mouth and they vanished.


	3. Chapter 3

When Chakotay woke and checked the time, it was 0317. His sheets were damp with sweat and other bodily fluids. Obviously his dreams had intensified again. He contemplated rising to meditate, but didn't really want to hear what his spirit guide had to say. He knew what her message would be. It was always the same two words: "Stay true." Whether an orienteering directive or a command to his wandering heart, he never knew.

Suddenly, he sensed that he was no longer alone in his quarters. The air currents had changed subtly and he held himself still and alert. Something moved.

"Kathryn?" He whispered.

"Good guess, Chuckles, but no. Not just yet." Q flung himself onto Chakotay's bunk.

"Dare I ask what it is you want, Q?"

"I shouldn't even tell you. I should just send you off to her."

"What have you done? Where is the captain?" Chakotay lunged at the omnipotent menace.

Q snapped his fingers and Chakotay's arms shrunk to a quarter of their length. He fell back to his pillow. Q hovered over him, his expression malignant. "Remember yourself, human! You will not speak to me as she does. She is special. You seem to have figured this out somewhere along the line, though you have no idea of the magnitude of her..." Q stopped himself and his features calmed. "She insisted that you agree to the terms. That is why I am here. You will go to her, I will suspend you in space-time, you will make love to her, overwhelm her with pleasure and you will both recall the events that follow as a vivid lucid dream, nothing more. Do you agree?"

Chakotay struggled to remain calm. "You want me to make love to Kathryn Janeway and then forget it? No deal."

"Oh, don't put on this righteous front, Chuckles. We both know you'll cave. This is how it will work: you acquiesce and I will give you your arms back."

Stay true, he thought and sat up, leaning into Q's face. "I'll agree. On one condition." Chakotay described his proviso and said, "That should suit your sadistic sensibilities."

Q eyed Chakotay, considering the idea. A cruel grin emerged on his face. "Done." Q snapped his fingers.

Chakotay vanished.


	4. Chapter 4

Space-time suspension left much to be desired. The silence and stillness were unsettling. The entertainment value of being weightless had lasted mere seconds. Janeway, certain that she was on the cusp of madness felt something change in the void.

"I told you he wouldn't agree, Q. You can send me back to my ship," she commanded to the darkness.

"Kathryn?"

Damn. "Chakotay, what are you doing here? Tell me you didn't agree to Q's foolishness."

A bright light flashed over them and coalesced into a vaguely familiar scene. They found themselves on the edge of a quarry pool, the air crisp and the sun shining weakly on their faces. On the horizon, a lumpy potato of a morning moon faded into the dawn light. Kathryn shivered in her nightdress.

"Where are we?" Chakotay looked around. He didn't quite recognize the location, there were no visible landmarks to orient by. Noting that Q had been kind enough to manifest him a running kit, he watched his captain take off barefoot down the trail toward the water then followed in her wake.

She stopped when she came upon the wetsuits and breathing gills placed neatly on the shore. "I don't know if this is Q's doing or my own, Chakotay, but I know where we are."

He stayed still and silent a few paces behind her. It occurred to him then that the reason they were here together was that she wanted this. Moreover, she wanted him. This revelation jolted him and he moved to touch her. He took her left hand in his and brought it to his lips. He thought he felt her tremble, but he could have been mistaken.

Kathryn continued, "We're on Mars. I was here once with Mark."

"Definitely Q's doing, then." He released her hand and muttered at the ground, "Sadistic bastard."

"Might as well go along with it for now." She was already rolling the suit and climbing in. He took the other and turned away to strip his shorts and top. By the time he had the suit half on, she was calling for help with her fasteners.

He stood behind her, staring at the terrain of pale flesh between the edges of the suit as he slowly fastened it shut. Gesturing to his own suit he asked, "Could you...?" His voice felt strange in his mouth.

She reached for him and deftly helped him into the arms of the wet suit, her nails dragging along his skin. She fastened him in and ran her hands down his back. He turned to her, catching her face in his hand.

"Kathryn.."

"I know. We have some 's something I want to show you. Do you know how to use one of these?" She handed him a breathing gill. He nodded. She fixed hers in her mouth then lowered herself into the cold, still water. He followed her in, adjusted his gill once more and submerged.

It had been some time since Chakotay had performed this particular exercise. Gill diving was mandatory training for tactical officers, but he had avoided it in the years since his Academy days. As the water closed over his head and the pressure increased, his heart changed its rhythm and his stomach clenched. He had the distinct impression that she was leading him away from the initial purpose of their presence in this dreamscape. This was hardly an opportune moment for either pressure or protest so he pressed on, Kathryn's guidelight leading him ever deeper, twinkling like a lodestar in the dark water.

Chakotay followed his captain through eerily lit underground channels. She stayed below the surface of the water, where the artificial lighting strips were brightest, emerging only once or twice to gain her bearings. The caverns seemed endless to Chakotay and he felt increasingly like Persephone being led into the underworld never to return.

By the time they reached the cavern, Chakotay was seeing dark red spots floating in his vision. He broke the surface panting and heaved himself up on the ledge. He felt the firm grasp of Kathryn's hand on his shoulder.

"All right?" Her voice echoed against the wall she faced.

He looked up at the cavern walls. The place had been carefully excavated, layer by layer. "Where are we?" he husked, still, to his great dismay, sounding breathy and panicked.

Kathryn lowered herself at his side, still facing the wall. "I discovered something here once: a fossil. Before I entered the academy, I came here with -" She stopped and shook her head. "Well, that's not important." She turned her face to his, finally looking at him. Chakotay felt he had just been brought into focus.

"Why are we here, Kathryn?" His voice and his breathing had stabilized, at last. He reached behind him to wrap a warm hand around her ankle.

"Q told you -"

"I want to hear you say it." He held her gaze, afraid to blink. Irrationally, he worried that if she looked away, he would disappear completely.

Kathryn shivered and leaned against him. "I think I'd rather show you," she whispered. She brought her hand to his face. "I'm going to kiss you now, Chakotay. Any objections?"

He shook his head and closed his eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

Kathryn moved her lips gently against Chakotay's, her breath leaving in puffs of warm air against his cheek. His mouth was pliant and welcoming. They leaned into each other, wrapping their arms around one another. He threaded his left hand into her wet hair; hers found his ear. His lips tightened in a smile and he pulled back.

"Oomox, Kathryn?"

"Do you have any idea how many times I've watched you play with your ear?" She leaned into his hand and looked up at him mischievously.

"I do not play with my ear."

"You do." She kissed him. "Weekly if not daily. It's quite endearing." Taking his ears in both hands, she ran the edge of her thumbnail around the outsides. "Besides, it's not just a Ferengi technique." His head fell back and he let out a moan at her subtle touch. She shifted to her knees and pressed her lips to his exposed neck.

Chakotay marveled at how she could be so dynamic, ricocheting here and there at full power one moment and so still and calm the next. He felt utterly lost to her - devoted as he was - and knew he would follow the radical reaction that was Kathryn Janeway to the end of time itself. He guided her mouth to his once more, trying to embed the taste of her on his desperate lips.

Just as the confines of the wetsuit were becoming a discomfort, Kathryn reached for the fastenings. He paused.

"Do we need to talk about this?"

"No. Not if I'm meant to believe this was a dream. In my dreams, we talk very little." Her tongue dove for his as she released him from the thick fabric. He fumbled with her suit and fought to stay focused as her hands drew patterns on his drying skin. Frustrated, he moved away, stood up, pulling her with him and positioned himself behind her. Without the sweet distraction of her hands and mouth, he easily removed her wetsuit and then turned his attention to her newly exposed skin.

"Kathryn," he murmured, entranced. "Tell me what we do in your dreams." He pressed his body to hers, skin to skin at last and they both released a long-held sigh. She settled into his arms and hummed as he kissed a line from her shoulder to the base of her ear.

"Sometimes…" she rasped, her voice dense with desire. "It's urgent. We're rough with one another. Some nights, I throw you against a bulkhead. Others, it's you that thrusts me into a corner."

"Like this?" He knocked her forward gently and she pressed her hands to the wall. She pushed back against him, moaning in response.

"No, the other way." His hands ran up and down along her spine, eliciting more sounds of pleasure. "This is how we usually end up in the bath, when we take our time with each other. What about your dreams, Chakotay?" She turned to face him, pulling him against her as she leaned into the cold cave wall.

"Daydreams mostly. In among the fruit trees of one planet, on the lakeshore of another, sometimes in a cave like this. It always starts the same." Chakotay stroked her face and let his hands roam over her upper body. "You come to me smiling and tell me we can finally have everything we want and I kiss you."

"Oh," she smiled, but her eyes were sad. "We can finally have one thing we want."

"Yes." He kissed her.

They moved then, grinding their bodies together. After a few minutes of this, when the only words that escaped his throat was her name and the only sound she could make was a whimpered "Oh", they slid to the ground and joined properly. Holding still and panting, they stared at each other.

"I feel like we'll only get one shot at this." Her eyes filled with regret.

"Knowing Q, I'll only get one shot at this. You, however… We could slow down."

"No. Together. Once will have to be enough." She pulled him to her once more and rolled him over.

Between the rough cave floor and the silky warmth of her body, Chakotay didn't last long but Kathryn was ready and waiting. She fell to pieces all around him as he burst inside her. As their heartbeats slowed, a potent fatigue overwhelmed them both. She murmured words of peace to his chest as she struggled to stay awake and with her last shred of consciousness whispered, "I'm so sorry… we have to forget."

"Don't worry," he mumbled. "I'll remember for both of us."


	6. Chapter 6

Voyager had slowed to impulse. That was the first thing Chakotay became aware of. The second was the warm body wrapped in his arms. Sighing, he curled himself closer and ran his hand along the hairy muscled leg of his companion. His brow furrowed.

"Good morning, lover. Was it good for you too?" Q's voice was smarmy and too loud for Chakotay's throbbing head.

Chakotay groaned and rolled away, gently placing his feet on the floor and his head in his hands. He felt sick and disoriented and his heart was dropping like a stone in his chest. "What does this mean, Q? Was any of that real? Who was I with last night? Was that you? If you wanted to get laid you could have just asked"

"Don't flatter yourself!" Q chortled. "I should tell you it was me. It would make no difference. Right now she's nursing a cup of coffee and a splitting headache and trying to put aside the lucid dream she had about yet another inappropriate liaison with her first officer. She'll be in a miserab;e mood all day and it's your fault."

"Of course it is." Chakotay rolled his eyes. "My fault for loving her. No blame to spare for the meddling omnipotent pain in the ass -"

"Hold your tongue! I can do that trick with your arms to other parts of your anatomy, Chuckles. Do not tempt me." Q's eyes blazed dangerously. Then, like a storm passing, his expression changed to pity and he sat next to Chakotay on the bunk. "Do you regret your choice now? Do you see what a kindness it would have been to take these memories from you both? I am not so cruel."

Chakotay stood shakily and hauled himself to the sink. "It might have been kinder to forget, but I refuse to regret my choice." He washed his face and returned to the bedroom with a towel and a renewed sense of optimism. "In fact, you've given me something even you couldn't have. For all your power, you will likely never spend a night like that with Kathryn Janeway. So, thank you, Q." Chakotay smiled genuinely at the unfathomable being. "I'm grateful." He pulled on a uniform and headed to the door.

Q appeared to be puzzled by Chakotay's shift in attitude. "Where are you going?"

"To sickbay, then the bridge. I'm going to very quietly bring my captain a hypospray and a cup of coffee then get to work on the pile of reports. We still have a ship to run. I trust you'll see yourself out." And then he was gone.

"Humans!" Q exclaimed and vanished in a flash of indignation.


End file.
